From joyously independent to heart-wrenchingly alone; singledom connects one with a vast spectrum of emotions.
Having spent the majority of the last 10 years as a single woman, I have found the following steps to be the keys to keeping my “eyes on the prize” (which ultimately is my own happiness – single or not).
1. KEEP BUSY
Whether it is finishing a book you keep forgetting about, doing the laundry, getting out on the town or starting a new hobby; fill your days with activity. Being stagnant and over-analyzing your self and your life is the enemy of the healthy single! Some self-reflection is good, but too much can send you spiraling into doubt and depression when you truly have no reason for it.
If you fill your days with useful and enjoyable tasks, you will find there’s not a lot of time for you to feel lonely… you’re just too damn busy!
2. TREAT YOURSELF
Find little ways to do the things for yourself that you would want a partner to do for you, or that you would do for them. Buy yourself that cute pair of sandals you’ve been eyeballing, or cook yourself a decadent meal using a new recipe you’ve wanted to try (and don’t skip the wine!).
As much as it’s nice to have someone else do these things for you, why wait? Do them for yourself today – singles deserve to feel special too.
3. HANG OUT WITH FRIENDS/FAMILY
We all tend to spend less time with friends and family when we are in a committed relationship. Take this opportunity to enjoy the company of the people in your life who you love and who love you!
This helps especially when you feel a little lonely. The love that already exists in your life is enough to remind you that a partner should only be a supplement to your already pretty awesome existence.
4. FOCUS ON YOUR CAREER
There is no better time to laser focus on what you’re doing at work then when you are single. Pick up extra projects, do overtime, and take classes. Being ambitious only serves to better your life independently, and it allows you an advantage in setting yourself apart from everyone else in the professional world.
Show your superiors what a rock star you are, and enjoy the fruits of your labour!
Having a bigger paycheck (that you don’t have to share with anyone) means more stability in the future and more resources to treat yourself with.
5. LOVE YOURSELF
Eat well, sleep well, do emotional inventory, journal, exercise, indulge sometimes, meditate.
Remind yourself that living single means choosing yourself over settling for less. It means passing on something that isn’t quite what you want, and waiting for something worthy of all the awesome that is you!
You can, and should get every little thing you need from your life as it exists right now.
So, whenever you have your cellphone in your hand, thumb poised over the dial button while thinking about calling that old boyfriend you know will pick up because you’re feeling a little lonely today…. just think about these steps.
You don’t really want to make that call now, do you?