For those who, like me, have either sabotaged themselves or have borne witness to the self-destruction of someone else and have lost a love that seemed to be heading in all the right directions.
To all of you who are feeling sad, angry, lost, scared, alone, or are in any other kind of emotional pain or suffering…
It gets better.
In the space between sleeping and waking, where the earthy smell of your skin still lingers…
In the fog of lucid dreams, where the deep yet gentle baritone of your disembodied voice echoes through my mind…
In the hours between dusk and dawn where your eyes find mine in that soft, searching gaze, and hold me there…
That is where I have loved you.
I hope you know that I see you.
Through your struggles with chaos and confusion, your light burns bright like the corona of the sun bursting forth from behind the shadowy presence of the moon in an eclipse.
Despite the darkness of guilt and pain you feel encompassed in, the light of your warm and innocent heart remains a shining beacon, calling to those who would dare to love you.
Though you attempt to hide from me, fearing that you will cause me pain, I see you.
I see you, and I will attempt to paint this beautiful being I see with my words so you may also see yourself through my eyes.
I see you very clearly, and through these words, I hope you will too.
I was moved beyond words, and compelled to share.
“I have looked to you in my darkest moments, searched for you as though fumbling for the candle and matches during an unexpected and interminable blackout. I am the ship at sea, seeking you as my guiding light. Nay, I am the sea, rising up to the horizon because I yearn to be closer to you.
The core of your true self is never lost. Let go of all the pretending and becoming you’ve done just to belong. Curl up with your rawness and come home. You don’t have to find yourself; you just have to let yourself in.
~ D. Antoinette Foy ~
I stood on the shore of an ocean; a vast, dark, swirling pool of unknown. That was the beginning of my becoming my true self.
Trust me, that sounds much more ominous than it really is.
The darkness of it all existed simply because I had yet to manage the bravery to find her. I had been standing on the shores, trying to see her world clearly from dry land.
When really, all I had to do was dive in.
Now, I am beginning to familiarize myself with this bright, beautiful, charming and delightfully clever woman, floating quietly in the mysterious depths of my unconscious mind.
I have always been vaguely aware of her presence, and am almost childlike in my curiousity about her. I enjoy watching her; lingering in her presence… finding many nuances, many desires, and many beliefs that I was just not aware existed. Whispers of them may have drifted by in dreams or in altered states of consciousness, but right now is the first time I have been able to see them with any clarity.
How many nights have you come home from work or school, sat down with your “device” (yes gamers, consoles count too!), and before you knew it, it was 2am and your eyes were burning from staring at the LCD for too long?
Be honest. We’ve all done this without even realizing it was happening. After which we’ve shamefully crawled into bed and secretly promised ourselves to never do it again…
…Only to repeat said behaviour over, and over, and over.
Technology, though amazing and beneficial to us in so many ways, can also rob us of the very things that make us human!
It connects us to each other quickly and divides us from each other even more quickly.
Here are 7 ways technology is robbing us of our humanity… and hopefully you don’t recognize all 7 things happening to you. (That means you’re already a techno-zombie and I WILL be forced to kill you)
Anger, sadness, disappointment, frustration; my mind and my heart are black holes of emotional turmoil.
Wow. I’m so Emo…